“She looks good, she really does...”

“She looks good, she really does”, I overheard them saying, then... "It’s awful though she had difficulty remembering my name.” If only they could see and feel what I do.

Elvis makes an appearance

Sometimes it may take me 15 minutes or more simply to pull the bed covers down so that I can begin maneuvering my legs to a spot where a decision must be made - which foot will touch the floor first. This results in pushing or pulling myself to an upright position.  Now, the day might actually start! Uh, no!! Elvis thought he would surprise me with an impromptu visit.  Once leg begins to move it was off to morning rituals in the bathroom via the red Cadillac. Finally get dressed and about 3 1/2 hours have vanished.

“She sure looks good, she really does” I overheard them say. Today is adventure, sorry appointment, day.  I begin by gathering everything I think I could possibly need. Check, recheck.  Okay, think I just might have it all off to the door. Oops, where is the bus pass? Found it, out the door and headed for elevator. Ground floor and walk to pick up spot. Driver arrives and gets out saying “Good morning, you sure look good.”

Invisible symptoms

I think back to how much hot water and Voltaire gel I used to get my toes and fingers to loosen up this morning. With help we load up and off we go. Need to hold my hands, slight tremor plus foot will not be still. Arrive, begin to get off the bus, appears it’s going to be a good day. Nawww, couldn’t be Elvis came back for an encore and brought Jerry Lee with him. Once show was over, continued to meeting. After meeting, went to wait for bus. Pretty uneventful ride home, except I forgot driver’s name.

“She sure looks good, really she does. Not sick at all.” I start to ponder as a lupie, Arkie Parkie who hasn’t seen much in years just what does SICK look like? As a lupie, should I have a 24/7 “butterfly mask” or I might have learned how to take care of my skin and wear proper make-up to cover mask? Arkie Parkie, well, not every Parkie has tremors, shuffling feet, speech difficulty, constipation, incontinence.

Just because you’re not able to see disease/symptoms doesn’t mean they don’t exist. Now, for not seeing much in years, I believe people really think I can’t possibly dress myself nor apply make-up properly. I may not have seen much in years, BUT I can smell mean and ugly miles away.

“She sure looks good, really she does. Not sick at all.”

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